extraneous work (1): 6,5 years of this artist's blog

so time flies. and it happens i repeat myself. what i would like to do next is start a little series on all the extra -sometimes extraneous- work that comes along with being an artist, for me at last.

is this an interesting subject? not sure. why would a musician blogging about practising scales interest me? how she has to make recordings to submit to ... and how she has to do photo shoots, buy strings, tune the instrument, heat the appartment... we take all these things for granted, even when we're in awe of her music. even then, would my interest stretch beyond reading what influences / influenced her, her coming of age as a musician etc? not sure.

when i look at the large amount of time i spend on music (practising, myself; listening to music) and compare it to the amount of time i read about musicians/composers... it doesn't bode well for how interesting my own blog would be to others than myself. [still, the blog at least makes my art available on the web, and it has the added advantage of offering me the opportunity to crystallize some of my thoughts on art.]

but i suppose i would be interested in a description of this musician's activities, if it is well written, and offered some real insight in what drives her, both musically and as a person i suppose, since it seems hard to separate the two completely. and if like on this blog, the description would be interlaced with music...

anyway. it seems i would do well to at least write well on this blog. yet i tend to think that if i had wanted to become a good writer, then i would not have become an artist. most things takes a lot of time and energy to do well, and writing a blog is no exception. worth it too, since writing this blog helps me in important ways with my art itself: to present my art, to think about art and artists, to rethink my art, to rethink my artist's position in life and society, and even to create my art.

in order to present my art here, i spend quite some time on photography and subsequent tuning of digital images with photoshop and other image editors, such as picasa. a subject for the next post in this series, but as an example:


outsider in woman-man dance (own work, 2010-2013, 21 x 30cm, click on the image for an enlargement)

difficulties abound: the colours of the drawing are hard to capture even with my canon 650d; then apart from often tricky colour adjustments the white-balance and the brightness of the picture need to be calibrated for use on computer screens. for shiny paintings, reflection-specks are edited out. then the image has to be saved for web, in a typical compromise between size and detail.

the drawing itself combines two themes: man-woman dance, and outsiderness (being an outsider). much as i would like to be able to write strikingly about my art, this is where i usually find myself at a loss for words.

lately i realize that this has something to do with a `trite' question: what do we mean with `meaning'? i cannot explain the meaning of art, i feel. if it has meaning (whatever that means), then the most important part of that meaning to me is essentially non-verbal. what is the meaning of the goldberg variations?

art appreciation, a study after van gogh, and an old rotring-pen drawing

study after van gogh (own work, 2013, 30 x 21 cm, click on the image for an enlargement)

always drawing, always thinking... i also share some other artistic characteristics with van gogh. like lack of artist recognition :-). [van gogh was very avant-garde, i'm just plain old-fashioned (except in the `details'): painting, drawing, sculpting.]

seriously, after having had three exhibitions this year, i find myself wondering once again what it takes to get people interested in art? it hardly seems to matter how hard it is and how long it takes to achieve a certain artistic mastery, it seems to be all about `buzz' (generalized page rank...see previous posts).

with just little recognition, at times i find it difficult to keep up my motivation to go further, work harder, push beyond my current limits. but on the other hand, i find the work to be its own reward and its own recognition. there something special in having drawings that i made 30 years ago, and from every period in between till now, and see the development, see aspirations coming true.


horse (own work, 1984, 20 x 30 cm, click on the image for an enlargement)

(this drawing i made with a rotring pen...and i'm still drawing with rotring pens over 30 years later.)

there is also some artistic merit in lack of recognition: it gives a lot of freedom, and quiet. especially the quiet i'm starting to appreciate more and more.

[a year ago i wrote on this subject also, see this post on frida kahlo. the downside to my dedicated-to-art blog seems that inevitably i repeat myself. i also have trouble highlighting other artists (much as i would like to!) since i'm always running behind with putting up my own work on the internet, due to health issues.]

young woman in tangerine dress (notre dame des anges)

young woman in tangerine dress (notre dame des anges) (own work, 2014, 55 x 80 cm, click on the image for an enlargement)

this painting also arose from experimenting, but it appears more traditional. if you look more closely you can see the paper cut-outs that i used to start the painting. the light tangerine colour is captured poorly by the photograph. my current three main points of painting people: expression, expression, expression...

and still more (notre dame des anges)

notre dame des anges with folded hands (own work, 2014, 55 x 80 cm, click on the image for an enlargement)

see the previous post: i'm simply working very hard to get things to work... which for now seems to imply that i'm hardly involved on a conscious/verbal level, so i can't really add much to the picture itself. endless reworking, adding of extraneous materials etc., to achieve a certain expression. once again, a photograph hardly does justice to the real thing.

[repeated from previous posts: the woman portraits made in this series share the name `notre dame des anges´. this is a reference to the `medieval´ spirituality i mentioned above. but the portraits are of course not a depiction of maria. they are intended as portraits of contemporary women emanating this type of spirituality which i find hard to describe.
in this series i experiment with all sorts of visual elements. you can see that i do not shy away from outsider-like techniques. at the same time, i'm also studying the human form and face, as a means of expressing spirituality, vulnerability, openness, unarmedness etc.]

notre dame des anges (again)

notre dame des anges with shells (own work, 2013-2014, 55 x 80 cm, click on the image for an enlargement)

well, i worked hard on this painting, and yet it's like i'm still feeling my way around... perhaps this is a sign of finally reaching a stage where the result is not in my own hands. this might seem strange for an artist, but if i really want to reach other planes, then at some point i must allow for results that are difficult to judge from where i'm currently standing.

which is why i think the painting is finished. it is what it is, and in reality it touches me with its colour, form, and expression (although the photo doesn't capture all of this very well).

[repeated from previous posts: the woman portraits made in this series share the name `notre dame des anges´. this is a reference to the `medieval´ spirituality i mentioned above. but the portraits are of course not a depiction of maria. they are intended as portraits of contemporary women emanating this type of spirituality which i find hard to describe.
in this series i experiment with all sorts of visual elements. you can see that i do not shy away from outsider-like techniques. at the same time, i'm also studying the human form and face, as a means of expressing spirituality, vulnerability, openness, unarmedness etc.]

street art project by google

google launched a wonderful project: street art on google view.

i'm a longtime fan of street art, for various reasons. one of these reasons is that street art relates closely to the human need for artistic (visual) expression, stripped from commercial and elitist considerations.

you can of course wonder why i do not engage in street art myself...

but that is a question of circumstance and personality. i'm shy to perform in public, and i'm also not at ease with anti-street-art legislation. if i would have a commission, and if i could work in reasonable peace, it would be different... so i can see myself doing murals (i did some inside murals long ago, and it was very inspiring) but only if the wall in question is given to me freely and explicitly.

nonetheless i have great respect for many street artists who are more daring in their approach, and who create wonderful pieces for everyone to see. in my opinion, we need art very dearly in this technocratic society. and this whole capitalistic structure where a very few rich people control all the infrastructure, buildings, land...why? do not all people have a right to this earth?

street art is a way of challenging these rigid and corrupt societal structures, in a way that i often find endearing and enriching. we need societal change. we really do. so instead of wasting our attention on football and fickle politicians and corrupt bankers and other media `stars', why not simply go look at art once in a while?

museum van bommel van dam (15 june - 10 august 2014)

from 15 june - 10 august 2014 i'm participating in the art event

join in!

in museum van bommel van dam (modern art, venlo, the netherlands)



mountain blaze (78 x 200 cm)